free museum days

11 THINGS: Free Museum Days

Thursday, September 28, 2006

1. First Tuesdays: Asian Art Museum, California Historical Society, Cartoon Art Museum (pay what you wish), Conservatory of Flowers, de Young Museum, Legion of Honor, Museum of Craft & Folk Art, San Francisco Museum of Modern Art, Yerba Buena Center for the Arts.

2. First Wednesdays: California Academy of Sciences, Exploratorium, Mexican Museum, Museo ItaloAmericano, San Francisco African American Museum and San Francisco Zoo.

3. First Thursdays: Chinese Historical Society of America, Pez Museum (Burlingame) and the San Francisco Museum of Craft & Design.

4. Second Saturdays: Bay Area Discovery Museum (Sausalito).

5. Second Sundays: Oakland Museum of California.

6. Third Mondays: Contemporary Jewish Museum.

7. Thursdays: Hearst Museum of Anthropology (Berkeley).

8. Free public tours: San Francisco City Hall, Contemporary Jewish Museum (12:30 p.m. Sun. and Wed.), Gold Rush Trail, San Francisco City Guides, San Francisco Botanical Garden, others.

9. Always free: African-American Museum and Library (Oakland), Cable Car Museum, CCA Wattis Institute for Contemporary Arts, Chinese Cultural Center, Maritime Museum, Mills College Art Museum (Oakland), Museum of Children's Art Oakland, Museum of the City of San Francisco, Octagon House, Presidio Museum, Randall Museum, San Francisco Center for the Book, San Francisco Fire Museum, Takara Sake USA Museum (Berkeley), Triton Museum (Santa Clara).

10. Sometimes free: Habitot, including Oct. 6 (Mooncake Festival) and Oct. 8 (Indigenous People's Day).

11. Free, but coin-operated: Musée Mécanique.

Tim Sullivan, tsullivan@sfchronicle.com

http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2006/09/28/NSGA9L9CPV1.DTL

This article appeared on page G - 3 of the San Francisco Chronicle

jet li's best

11 THINGS: Jet Li's best

Thursday, September 21, 2006

1. Fist of Legend: (1994) Based on Bruce Lee's "Fist of Fury." Jaw-dropping everything. Key quote: "What fist is this? Don't ask, it's a good fist if it wins."

2. Once Upon a Time in China II: (1991) The sequel to the classic Tsui Hark film. Once upon a time, there weren't so many "Once Upon a Time" movies.

3. The Tai-Chi Master: (1993) Tianbao chooses ambition over friendship, Junbao is overcome by grief at the betrayal and yours truly still loves Michelle Yeoh.

4. Fong Sai-Yuk: (1993) Jet Li and his (awesome) mom help dad and the Red Lotus Society. A tribute to parents everywhere.

5. Once Upon a Time in China: (1990) Tsui Hark's classic. Years after seeing the film I still find it quite healthy to blurt out "Wong Fei Hung" every now and then.

6. My Father Is a Hero: (1995) Jet Li goes undercover and his kung fu fighting son steals the show. A sentimental film made more so by the fact that Anita Mui passed away in 2003.

7. Fearless: (2006) Jet Li finally returns to his early '90s glory. Go see it this weekend ... and then go see it again.

8. Fong Sai-Yuk II: (1993) Jet Li deals with moral conflict ... and two high-maintenance wives. Gender-bender craziness throughout.

9. Swordsman II: (1992) Jet Li renounces violence, goes into seclusion and inevitably gets drawn back into conflict. Oh and um ... Brigitte Lin is in the film ... 'nough said.

10. Shaolin Temple: (1982) Jet Li's first. That alone makes it worth seeing.

11. Unleashed: (2005) Jet Li gets a new leash on life when he befriends a blind Morgan Freeman. The result? Great acting ... and a really good film. Key quote: "Ripe means sweet and sweet means good." Jet Li: (smiling) "The kiss was ripe!"

Tim Sullivan, tsullivan@sfchronicle.com

http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2006/09/21/NSGFRL53HE1.DTL

This article appeared on page G - 3 of the San Francisco Chronicle

neurotic

11 THINGS: That Make Us Neurotic

Thursday, September 14, 2006

1. Waiting for the bus: After five minutes: It'll be here soon. After 10: It won't be. After 15: Would someone pleeease light a cigarette so the bus shows up?

2. Renting: After five years: Still like renting. Still love S.F. After 10: Renting sucks. Still love S.F. After 15: How does one save? Damn you S.F.!!!!!

3. Crowded trains: After five minutes: (Five people within a foot) At least I can't fall down. After 10: (10 people within a foot) Someone didn't shower today. After 15: (15 people within a foot) Whose hand was that?

4. Conversations: After five minutes: Why is she doing all the talking? After 10: Why am I doing all the talking? After 15: Time for a drink.

5. Drinking: After five minutes: Just one little drink. After 10: Make it a double. After waking up: Swear to God ... I'm never drinking again.

6. Pigeons: After five pigeons are close: Why do they walk like that? After 10: Why is that old woman feeding them? After 15: Nooooo! Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

7. E-mail: First five minutes of day: Scroll through 200 e-mails. Next five: Delete 150 of them (with pleasure). Next five: Forward 40 of them (with sigh) and reply to remaining 10 (with RSI).

8. Newspapers: First five pages: Sure, it's bad news, but good news isn't news, is it? Next five: Shouldn't society be doing more? Next five: Hell meets handbasket ... where are the comics?

9. Being neurotic: First: Should I worry? Second: Should I worry that I'm worrying? Third: I'm not going to worry ... which is precisely why I'm worried.

10. Time: Never having enough to complete my entire ...

11. Things Column: Nor enough space.

Tim Sullivan, tsullivan@sfchronicle.com

http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2006/09/14/NSGGVL1IOI1.DTL

This article appeared on page G - 3 of the San Francisco Chronicle

words really satisfy

11 THINGS: Words Really Satisfy

Thursday, September 7, 2006

1. Nougatocity: Nougat + toxicity, or maybe atrocity. We're on the first word and we already have some deeply seated reservations about Snickers. Sentence usage: The gunk on the back seat of the 14 bus had a certain unpleasant air of nougatocity about it.

2. Peanutopolis: Peanut + metropolis. We're assuming Snickers is satisfied that we're doing this. We're also assuming Snickers is really satisfied with the fact that we're wondering why we're doing this as we're doing it. Sentence usage: For better or worse, Jimmy Carter is the president of Peanutopolis.

3. Satisfectellent: Satisfy + confection + excellent, or maybe insect repellent. Sentence usage: Watching Billy crush that big black bug with his Snickers bar was disturbingly satisfectellent.

4. Substantialicious: Substantial + malicious ... I mean delicious. I mean nutritious. I mean salacious ... I mean come on, already! It's a candy bar that looks like poop. Sentence usage: There was a substantialicious amount of laughter during that "Caddyshack" scene where Bill Murray plucked the candy bar from the bottom of the pool.

5. Goondoggle: Googol + boondoggle. Googol: A number that is equal to 1 followed by 100 zeros and expressed as 10{+1}{+0}{+0}. Boondoggle: A project funded by the federal government out of political favoritism that is of no real value to the community or the nation. Sentence usage: Military spending has become a major goondoggle.

6. Phobophobia: Fear of phobias. Sentence usage: His phobophobia was nothing compared with his hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia (fear of long words) or his coprastasophobia (fear of constipation).

7. Exhaustipated: Being simultaneously tired and constipated. Sentence usage: It was 4 a.m. and he was simply too exhaustipated to get out of bed and go to the bathroom.

8. Scrumpdili-icious: Tasty delicious crumping. Sentence usage: You see that kid's dance moves in the Dairy Queen parking lot the other day? Downright scrumpdili-icious!

9. Supercalifragalisticexpialadocious: The 34-letter song title from the 1964 Disney film "Mary Poppins." Sentence usage: Mary Poppins? What the hell am I talking about?????

10. Antidisestablishmentarianism: (28 letters) Opposition to the withdrawal of state support or recognition from an established church, especially the Anglican Church in 19th century England. Sentence usage: Antidisestablishmentarians tend to be pro long words.

11. Floccinaucinihilipilification: (29 letters) The action or habit of judging something to be worthless. Sentence usage: The floccinaucinihilipilification of attempting to actually spell floccinaucinihilipilification made him feel seriously exhaustipated.

Tim Sullivan, tsullivan@sfchronicle.com

http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2006/09/07/NSGQIKTV5O1.DTL

This article appeared on page G - 3 of the San Francisco Chronicle