brevity

11 THINGS: BREVITY

Thursday, July 26, 2007

1. Words

"The most valuable of all talents is that of never using two words when one will do."

- Thomas Jefferson

Translation: True.

2. Speaking

"If I am to speak ten minutes, I need a week for preparation; if fifteen minutes, three days; if half an hour, two days; if an hour, I am ready now."

- Woodrow Wilson

Translation: If I am to comprehend any of this, I need a good, stiff drink.

3. Humor

"Brevity is the soul of wit."

- William Shakespeare

Translation: Ha.

4. Love

"Brevity may be the soul of wit, but not when someone's saying 'I love you.'"

- Judith Viorst

Translation: And not when someone has written a book called "Alexander and the Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Day."

5. Clothing

"Brevity is the soul of lingerie."

- Dorothy Parker

Translation: Hush.

6. Understanding

"Brevity is very good, when we are, or are not, understood."

- Samuel Butler

Translation: Understood.

7. Music

"I like short songs."

- Jello Biafra

Translation: I like Jello.

8. Sincerity

"Be sincere; be brief; be seated."

- Franklin D. Roosevelt

Translation: Be quiet.

9. Choice

"Choose well, your choice is brief, and yet endless."

- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Translation: Whoops.

10. Art

"I will be brief. Not nearly so brief as Salvador Dali, who gave the world's shortest speech. He said I will be so brief I have already finished and he sat down."

- Edward Wilson

Translation: Best. Speech. Ever.

11. Ambition

"It is my ambition to say in ten sentences what others say in a whole book."

- Friedrich Nietzsche

Translation: Or 11.

Tim Sullivan, tsullivan@sfchronicle.com

http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2007/07/26/NSN4R6PEE2.DTL

This article appeared on page G - 3 of the San Francisco Chronicle