recent headlines

11 THINGS: Recent Headlines

Thursday, October 4, 2007

1. "Woman Gives Birth to Own Grandchildren"

Note to self: Lay off the cough medicine.
Follow-up note: No really ...
Conclusion: Seriously.

2. "FDA Cracks Down on Cough Medicine Ingredient"

Note to self: Wow ... that was fast.
Follow-up note: Oh, right ...
Conclusion: The Patriot Act.

3. "Lindsay's Dad to Help After Rehab"

Note to self: His rehab?
Follow-up note: Her rehab?
Conclusion: Rehab needs rehab.

4. "College Daily's Vulgarity Is Now Free-Speech Issue"

Note to self: Can't write it.
Follow-up note: Can't think it.
Conclusion: Can't print it.

5. "Bush Struggles to Stay Relevant in Climate Debate"

Note to self: Wait a second ...
Follow-up note: He was relevant?
Conclusion: Well, I'll be damned.

6. "Bill Clinton Wades In to Defend Hillary's Reputation"

Note to self: Upside-down situation.
Follow-up note: Upside-down decade.
Conclusion: Perfect.

7. "China Bans Bra, Underwear, Sex Toy Ads"

Note to self: Macy's.
Follow-up note: American Apparel.
Conclusion: Good Vibrations.

8. "Mets Complete Stunning Collapse"

Note to self: Stunning?
Follow-up note: Not really.
Conclusion: It's the Mets.

9. "Supreme Court Faces an Array of Divisive Cases"

Note to self: Onion headline?
Follow-up note: No???
Conclusion: "Public Faces an Array of Obvious Headlines."

10. "French Mime Marcel Marceau Dies"

Note to self:
Follow-up note:
Conclusion:

11. "11 Things: Gridlock Edition"

Note to self: S'mores were being handed out to drivers during Critical Mass!
Follow-up note: Can't top that.
Conclusion: Nobody can.

- Tim Sullivan, tsullivan@sfchronicle.com

http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2007/10/04/NSLASHRGS.DTL

This article appeared on page G - 3 of the San Francisco Chronicle