noise annoys

11 Things: Noise Annoys

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

1. Fans cheering:

Sounds like: Roman times.
Upside: Cheering for the Red Sox.
Downside: Cheering for anyone else.
Annoying when: Groupthink devolves into mob mentality.

2. Blue Angels:

Sounds like: Macho something or other.
Upside: Only once a year.
Downside: Disagreement forbidden.
Annoying when: They fly through my kitchen.

3. The sound of one hand clapping:

Sounds like: America's current political landscape.
Upside: Democrats and Republicans equally annoying.
Downside: Apathy.
Annoying when: Newspapers fail to grasp public discontent.

4. Pigeons cooing:

Sounds like: Insanity.
Upside: None.
Downside: Awkward dancing, pooing.
Annoying when: Someone feeds them.

5. Garbage trucks:

Sounds like: Your brain being pried open at 5 a.m.
Upside: Trash is gone.
Downside: Trash isn't gone.
Annoying when: You can't go back to sleep.

6. Opera:

Sounds like: Life and death.
Upside: Life.
Downside: Death.
Annoying when: Your wineglass breaks on the high note.

7. Screaming lady downstairs:

Sounds like: Screaming lady downstairs.
Upside: She's having sex.
Downside: She's been having sex for the past hour.
Annoying when: She has sex for another hour after that.

8. Fingernails on the chalkboard:

Sounds like: A paper I wrote in college.
Upside: They're not your fingernails.
Downside: Terrible visceral feeling.
Annoying whenever you hear it.

9. N-Judah:

Sounds like: The train is finally arriving.
Upside: The train is finally arriving.
Downside: The soft bigotry of low expectations.
Annoying when: The train keeps right on going.

10. Sirens:

Sounds like: My neighborhood.
Upside: They're not coming for me.
Downside: The sirens have nothing to do with Greek mythology.
Annoying when: You hear them every single night.

11. Buzzcocks:

Sounds like: Punk.
Upside: They're still playing.
Downside: It's not 1975-1981 anymore.
Annoying when: Bands you love get older.

- Tim Sullivan, tsullivan@sfchronicle.com

http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2007/10/10/NSFQSM66J.DTL

This article appeared on page G - 3 of the San Francisco Chronicle